Fanboy Feature - April 9th 2009

You may have started an innocent 'which game is best?' discussion on an internet forum only to be met with 'ugh, don't get this on the PS3, dude' or the more idiomatic 'the gaybox 720 reeks of fail'. If this has happened to you, my friend, you have encountered a fanboy.

I hate fanboys. Not with the same brand of misguided, passionate abhorrence fanboys hold against consoles they don't own, nor like the level of ferocity they use to bully gaming journalists into giving games certain scores. No, my hatred differs because it is entirely within reason.

My main problem understanding this bizarre breed has to do with console allegiance. I totally appreciate that when you've paid upwards of 200 for a machine the last thing you want to be told is that 'games would have run less shatter on that other one', and that, Mr. F. Boy, is fine. However, in holding the console - essentially the thing you use to access the thing you really want to use - in such high regard, you're missing the point of gaming entirely.

Halo fans are often labelled Fanboys. It's not the game, but the resolute attitude against reasoning that makes a fanboy

Consoles are of tertiary concern - a mandatory by-road to the good stuff. Hating a game for being on another console, or a console for having the audacity to offer gamers a broader variety of games to explore, is like disliking a Morrissey album because it plays on a Sony stereo rather than disapproving of his mopey tones.

Essentially, fanboys are misguided, misinformed, and on their knees in front of any company they choose to devote their undying loyalty to. If you ask Mr. F. Boy if they'd ever buy a 'rival console', they'd likely punch you (doing this, reader, is not advised), but beneath the insecurity of buyer's remorse can they really say if Nintendo bought all the major game franchises tomorrow, leaving only Peggle for Sony and Microsoft to scrap over, they wouldn't swap allegiances in an instant? Of course they would, and this only proves games should rule the whims of gamers, not consoles.

Think Haze is better than Halo? It would be hard not to label you a fanboy at this point.

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